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Why We Hate Skinny Jeans

by Amanda Murray April 14, 2016 3 Comments

Why We Hate Skinny Jeans

 

It’s no secret that here at JNCO, we don’t get down with skinny jeans. On the contrary, we live and breathe wide-leg, ultra-baggy jeans. The wider the better! Well we talked to a few people and they vigorously agree – this skinny jeans fad has got to go.

 “Friends don’t let friends show camel toe.” – Lisa Kindel, Media Gal Friday

“I don’t know about you but I don’t want to look like Spongebob Triangle Pants. Calling attention to my thighs? No thanks!!” – Maria Moser, Change-Diapers.com

“I hate skinny legs! Why on earth would I want anyone to see that?” – Dan Nainan, Comedian/Actor, www.nainan.com

“This never-ending fad forced on us by the fashion industry means I have to try not to look at camel toes and moose knuckles every day. And this hipster trend means that because I have muscles on my calves I can’t find jeans that can pull up past my ankles!” – Jennifer Riggins, the eBranding Ninja

“I think guys wearing skinny jeans have only one reason to wear them – they do not have fathers at home or real men. There is no way that I would let my son go outside with some pants that look like they snap between the legs. Why I say this is because no real man will let his sons go outside looking like a ballerina or a ballerina reject. So skinny jeans to me are man leggings with a harder material.” – Charles Allen Robinson Jr. AKA Storm

 “They are uncomfortable and hard as heck to get on and off. There is nothing sexy about trying to get a pair off in the moment and falling down because you can’t get out of your jeans!” – Sarah, Southern Plantation Studio

“I hate skinny jeans because they remind me that I’m not a size 6 or age 28! My mom jeans allow me to stay in a blissful state of denial. I’m not really a size 10 or 45.” – Jennifer Bright Reich, www.MommyMDGuides.com

Kartanya Martinez has an epic last word…

“Absolutely, positively do not understand the concept of ‘skinny jeans,’ especially on men! Why would any male person wear them? All these toothpick legs and hair parted to the side with just a ‘Princess Diana’ eye peeping out is emasculation at its best. Men of the world , I beg of you, please take off your skinny jeans, burn the mofos and set your testicles free. They are taking your manhood with them and squeezing them into these feminine jeans, restricting your cajones into such a state you could possibly hit a higher octave than Marian Carey. Liberate your balls, pick them up and scream from the rooftops in your deepest masculine voice, ‘I am a man and I am proud.’” – Kartanya Martinez

Amanda Murray
Amanda Murray


3 Responses

hannah s
hannah s

May 24, 2016

sometimes i wear my skinny jeans under my 50 inchers

drew
drew

May 01, 2016

Skinny Jeans are a threat to our civilization. Men are being emasculated by these ugly creations. I don’t know how some people are able to get tem on. This fad MUST die!!!!

Rich at James
Rich at James

April 15, 2016

I love my skinny jean and my baggy jeans like I rocked in the 90’s as a raver and promoter in the sf Bay Area.
And I love my skinny jeans too
Although I do have to got to a plus size woman’s store to get them.
I have to say I saw the mammoth came back for sale I bought two pair during last Christmas I have to say I saw the mammoth came back for sale I bought two pair during last Christmas.

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